I’m sure you’ve been there.
You have something you would love to shoot for, but the “what if” holds you back.
What if things don’t work out?
What if I don’t finish it?
You may even be using the f word … what if I fail? Fail is such a personal word. The word fail is really much more about how you feel than anything else. It’s why it feels so uncomfortable.
But what if these two words could move you forward?
Walk with me for a minute or two.
If we are going to go down the what if trail, let’s walk right to the very end.
That’s the thing about what if … you use it until it makes you feel uncomfortable and then you stop. Until you think, “ooh, I don’t like that!” and then you think that is where you will end up.
It feels awful. Like you let yourself down and didn’t get to the end of the path.
But … what if … using these two words could move you forward and help you to see the power behind them, and how they can shift everything?
Let’s practice.
You have a goal, a big dream even. Something you have thought about but never taken a step forward to achieve. If we were face to face over coffee you would probably tell me that there is no point taking a step forward because you don’t think it would actually work. You’ve done the what if game, and it didn’t feel good. So you stayed put.
I imagine the coffee is my favourtie Muskoka Maple flavour and we are settled in for a good conversation, so I push back.
“Let’s take the what ifs to the very end”, I suggest.
What if your next step doesn’t work?
What if you get half way and you don’t get the results you are looking for?
Let’s really process it out and say that you have put in the time and the work, you invested what you thought you needed to, and things still didn’t work out.
It could be a professional goal, a relationship goal, or a personal goal. Something that you took a risk for and it just didn’t work out the way you wanted it to. You used the words, “I failed”.
But did you really?
Where are you in relation to where you started?
Here’s where the power lies.
I bet my coffee on the fact that you are not any worse off than where you are now, in fact you have learned some big things on how you want to move forward.
It’s the feeling that you will be worse off, or in a terrible place because you didn’t “make it”.
Truth? You are still ahead.
That shifts it doesn’t it?
Our coffee together has now taken a different turn.
It’s when you realize that you are no worse off for trying, in fact you have learned some things that can help you step into it further next time, that you realize you didn’t fail at all.
You just moved from being afraid to try, to feeling like you could try again.
Let’s play what if some more …
What if you achieved the goal, the dream?
Interesting how we so naturally process that we won’t get there, but what if you actually did?
What would change?
Who would be impacted, and changed?
What difference would you make?
I believe those are the most powerful what ifs to use.
If we stay, than we just stay and nothing changes. You are no worse off and you are probably a bit smarter as well.
But what if you get there?
That is the power of what if, because now you can see it.
You can begin to see why it is worth it to try.
You see the potential.
You see the difference you can make, the difference you can experience, and the strength you can find.
So today when you stop moving because you are thinking you can’t, grab a coffee, and sit down to share some time with me and shift to “what if”.
What if you can?
What if you do?
What if it makes all the difference?
Worse case scenario is there you are in the same place. I am just so confident that you will never be in the same place because you have learned a few things and grown along the way.
It’s the power of what if.
If you feel stuck and would love to work through some “what if” over coffee, let’s chat.